In Dog We Trust...

I know this blog is supposed to be about my journey to the marathon, but we had to say goodbye to our beloved Brandi the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I actually started this post last month (almost to the day), but it was too painful to continue writing at that time.

Unfortunately, the cancer that was discovered too late in Brandi's spine appears to have been in her brain and nervous system as well. As it was explained to us by our family vet, these things usually go undiagnosed until late in the game because dogs have various compensation techniques that allow it to grow unchecked. By the time you see the symptoms, it is probably too late to treat the cancer successfully for more than a few weeks at best. So, rather than continue to hold on for our sakes, we had her put to sleep for hers. A terrible decision to face but one we ultimately believe she was ready for.

We miss her very much, but we take solace in the fact that we got a great, symptom-free summer out of her, which we know she enjoyed as much as we did. For all of you who knew her, please remember her in the spirit of playfulness and as a being of pure unconditional love and a source of boundless joy.

Much has happened since then and I will recount that in a future post as I try to get back into a routine. Happy Holidays!

Necessary Adjustments

First off, I'd like to apologize to the one or two people who actually read this - I have had a rather busy month in between postings. As with any plan, unforeseen circumstances can complicate the best-laid plans, blah, blah, blah...on to good news first:

My first wonderful diversion was the wedding of some dear friends. The added bonus was that I was able to preside over their ceremony as I am a minister of the Universal Life Church. I won't go into details about that, but check out their site here and that will give you deeper understanding of my personal beliefs, at least as far as religion goes. The wedding ceremony and reception were superb and a great time was had by all. I'll ask my friends for permission to publish some pictures and their names to this blog and update in a future post. I'll also get a little more in-depth about my role as minister. It was truly a blast.

Now the all-consuming bad news that we've been dealing with for the past 2.5 weeks... Unfortunately, my beautiful canine companion, Brandi, hit a major snag in her recovery from lymphoma. The day after her last chemotherapy treatment (10/27 was her last dose of Cytoxan), she was acting a little weird and seemed rather uncomfortable. The following day, I returned home from work and she peed on the carpet in the living room right in front of our house guest within minutes of or arrival so I knew something was wrong right away. We rushed her to the oncologist and she whimpered and shivered the whole ride over, which was unbearably long (the oncologist is about 40 minutes away). She was diagnosed later that evening with sterile hemorrhagic cystitis, a side effect of Cytoxan which usually shows up much earlier in the treatment cycle. OK - not a huge deal - treatable and hopefully wrapped up within a month or less. While undergoing examination, they did notice that she was severely sensitive in her lower spine which they attributed to the cystitis or a possibility of disk degeneration. Neither diagnosis prepared me for what was to come next...

Last Monday, I came home and Brandi was fine when I arrived. She had been home all day with my wife playing and having fun. Now we were supposed to take it easy with her and restrict her activity but it is nearly impossible to do that with her. We are also of the mindset 'to let a dog be a dog' and that works for Brandi a large majority of the time, especially over the past 6 months or so that she's been treated for lymphoma.

Most of the time (and I'm talking 99.99%), you never would have known she had cancer. She was energetic and playful and showed no signs of illness except for the shaved stomach required for the ultrasound.

Back to last Monday - within 15 minutes of my arrival, she could not keep her legs under her and was having severe trouble standing up let alone trying to walk. In a severe panic, we once again rushed her to the same vet, 40 minutes away. It was the most painful car trip of my life. I started out driving, but quickly realized that due to her discomfort, my wife was better off driving while I tried to keep us all calm. That was an impossible task. Brandi was howling in pain, curled at my feet in the passenger side wheel well, barking and banging her head every time she did. I was yelling at Shanna to go faster and focus on the road. And she was basically gasping in concert with the dog while also yelling at drivers to get the hell out of our way . It was a long 35 minutes...

Upon arrival, I carried her in and they got a stretcher, took her back immediately and we waited. We both went outside at different times and cried and cursed at our poor pup's ordeal. They medicated her (we would medicate ourselves later) and explained that the area on her back that the ultrasound saw the week earlier could be another tumor. WTF?!?!?!?!?

Sure enough, a day later the CT Scan confirmed it. A mass on her spine and the slices showed one of her vertebrae missing a significant amount of bone. Now what...a biopsy? No thanks - too much damage for a diagnostic procedure (this would involve peeling back the muscle off the spine and ribs plus the large incision). A needle aspiration? OK - didn't show anything conclusive. Then the discussions about radiation treatments and survivability. Devastatingly short prognosis is 4-6 months.

Now we are on a homeopathic odyssey and I think I will continue the story in another blog. I'll get you the details when I get started (probably later this week).

So you see, my workout routine is off but I'm getting back on track as much as possible this week and I will keep this blog dedicated to it's original purpose. More updates soon...

40 yr marathon

I promised myself a long time ago that I would run the NYC marathon when I turned 40. So 2 weeks ago to the day, I celebrated my 39th birthday and realized I truly have to get busy in earnest now. This blog is an attempt to journal my progression and training (as well as throw a few thoughts out to the void).

Earlier this week I began a haphazard training and diet regimen that will undergo refinement as time goes on. See, the issue right now is that I feel I'm too fat to start running and the decision here is to walk and adjust my diet until I've lost a few pounds - okay 15 at a minimum... 20 and I'll feel much more comfortable. I'm terrified about what trying to move 255 lbs. along too fast will do to my joints.

Mostly, this is up to me. This is a very solitary goal and the only true outside influence that determines whether or not I am ultimately successful is winning a lottery spot for the marathon. If that doesn't happen, I will be crushed. If it does happen, and I fail because I'm a lazy ass or lose my motivation....well, I have it documented here and no excuses.

Finally for today... this is obviously a work in progress so I'll be adding lots of links to thought-provoking blogs, websites and other online amusements. I'll also let you know what works best for me in the way of workouts and the like and I'll be looking for the best online workout routines for several types of fitness to share with you.

peace,
'nik